May 222017

My Head ShotSelf-love. Self-esteem. Self-worth. A lot of us didn’t have much as teens. The sad part of it is a lot of us still don’t have too much. It’s a crying shame. Most of us have wonderful things to offer to this thing we call life. But many of us don’t offer them up because society tells us we don’t look “acceptable,” that we don’t fit in. . . because we’re larger or smaller than the average bear, we don’t have the right hair, we’re the wrong color or some other ridiculous reason. So we run and hide. Is this you? If it is, read on.

It’s How I Was Raised

That line was my mother’s BS excuse for why she could never change. “It’s how I was raised.” Well, most readers of this blog were raised in an age that taught us it’s all about others. Caring for and about others is a grand thing, provided you realize that YOU need some of that caring, too. Many of us didn’t and still don’t. I didn’t. It was all *them* and never me. It was instilled in me from a young age. I was fat, ugly and good for nothing. I owed my life to others because mine wasn’t worth it. And when it comes from your mother, it’s hard to tell yourself it’s wrong. Suffice it to say, by the time I was a young maid, there was nothing resembling self-esteem or self-worth anywhere near my soul.

Sometimes We Get Lucky

Despite my lack of self-esteem, there was one young man who saw through it all. He thought I was worth something. He thought I was beautiful. I still think he’s crazy, but he’s been hanging around for almost 50 years so maybe some of it’s true, eh? He taught me about unconditional love. Sadly, I didn’t understand that for a long, long, long time. It’s changing now. Better late than never, as they say.

What Society Tells Us

I probably don’t have to tell you that our culture in the U.S. says that to be worthy you should be tall, thin and preferably blonde OR have a big ass like Kim K. That’s acceptable because that turns you into a sexual object. Well, guess what? NOT OKAY. We are all worthy and sex should have nuttin’ honey to do with it.

I don’t know about you, but me, myself and I, for one, am getting tired of being told I don’t measure up. I think it’s time some of us pull ourselves up to our full height, whatever it may be, and start to show society that we can shine just as brightly as what it calls stars. I use that term very loosely. We’re the stars, ladies. We’re the ones who raise kids, work, create art, fix cars, do the rocket science (think Hidden Figures) and make this bright blue marble go ‘round.

What We Can Do

What can we do to counter society? Show ‘em they’re wrong. . . and I mean WRONG! How? Start by NOT. HIDING. Wear the bright clothing. Stand up front in the photos (very hard for me). Sing, dance, paint, do what it is you do and crow about it!!! Stick out that newly-found self-esteem! USE. IT. Don’t hide because you’re old, fat, not what society thinks is pretty or a combination of all the above. If you need inspiration, just look at my pic. I’m not any of it and I am starting to put it out there. Yeah, it’s cathartic for me, but it’s also fact. What fact? Like the old L’Oreal commercial used to say, “You’re worth it.” Yeah, I am. And so are you.

Why you should not hide or unhide

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are

Where are you? I know I’m not the only Old Busted Hotness around. There is strength in numbers. Start taking care of YOU if you haven’t been. Do you want a nice hair style? Get it. Would you feel better with your nails done? Get ‘em done. Want to take a college course? Go take it! Now I’m NOT telling you to break the bank here. But there are little things that can make you feel better about being you. Do them. Enjoy them. And then get out there proudly. Hold your beautiful head up high and show the world what you’ve got. STOP. HIDING. We are a force to be reckoned with.

Breaking Good

I am breaking new ground every single day. Some of it’s good. Some of it’s great. Some of it I need to try again. And again. And again. I was 40 years old before I could look at myself in a ladies room mirror because I was told I didn’t deserve to be putting on makeup and combing my hair like “normal” folks. Now when I walk into a public bathroom, I stare down that mirror!!! And, yeah, it stares back, but I no longer hate what I see. It has taken me a lot of years to get to this point. I’m just grateful I made it before check-out time.

The Point

My point is. . . . you are who you are. You are special, more special than you know. Do not check your self-esteem anywhere. Let your light shine. This world needs us old broads. They may not know it yet, but they DO. We have wisdom. We have knowledge. We have beauty. We know what it takes. We’ve been there. We’ve done that. Now it’s time to let the world know what we’ve got. Who’s with me?

See ya next time!

Jun 082016

Doesn't want to do That Which Must Be DoneAs a young woman, I had no trouble at all forcing myself to do most anything that I knew had to be done. Back then, it was fairly simple and straightforward. When That Which Must Be Done arrived, I set my mind to it and I finished it.  Miller Time!

Well, that was then and this is now. These days I no longer have the determination and perseverance of my younger self. I have to kick, yank and shove myself into the battle to do something I just don’t wanna do. If you’re old busted self is having this same problem, here are a six tips to force yourself to do That Which Must Be Done.

Comfortable Clothes

Put on some of your favorite old, comfy clothes to do That Which Must Be Done. This is not the time for a new outfit or something you need industrial-strength Spanx to get into. Now is the time for your old sweats, leggings, ratty tee shirts and, yes, even your pajamas. If it’s comfy and you feel good in it, put it on. Now if you are comfortable in formal clothes, by all means. . .

Comfortable Temperature

If it’s summer and you die in the heat but you’re trying to save money on the electric bill, put the air conditioning on just to get the task done. Freeze the house out if you have to. It’s only for a short time until you finish. And in reverse, if you’re freezing your arse off to try and save money on the heating bill, put on a comfy sweater and turn the heat up, again for a very limited time. Get that room to what’s comfortable for you and attack That Which Must Be Done.

Good Sniffs

Put your favorite scent in your Scentsy burner or light your favorite candle. Just need a temporary fix? Try room sprays. Lavender is relaxing for many. Vanilla works for a lot of folks, too. You know what your favorite scent it. Aroma therapy works.  Use it for That Which Must Be Done.

Favorite Music

If your task doesn’t require listening, grab your phone, tablet or laptop and click on Pandora, Spotify or your favorite play list. Get that music going, but only stuff you absolutely love. For me, it’s soft instrumental music or classical in the background, but if AC/DC gets your motivation going, turn it up!

Favorite Beverage

Like a nice cup of coffee or tea? Maybe a blend you keep for company or a special occasion? Heads up! This is your special occasion. Break it out and use the nice china cup while you’re at it. If hot chocolate gets your motor running, that’s fine, too. If you love cold drinks, fix whatever will keep you comfortable while you’re doing That Which Must Be Done. If iced tea, lemonade, soda (yeah, yeah, I know) or just ice cold water will do the trick, drink it.

The Promise of a Reward

Yes, I know this sounds a bit juvenile, but why do you think a reward system works with kids? Because we’re all human, that’s why. After doing a task that we’ve been avoiding, we want a treat. It doesn’t have to be anything big. No, you’re not going to buy yourself a brand new 70″ flat screen for balancing your checkbook, but how about rewarding yourself with an hour of reading? Maybe a nice long walk or a trip to the mall (sans credit cards unless you have money to burn). If you’re an exercise maven, promise yourself a nice run, a bike ride or a Zumba class. It doesn’t have to be material, but it does have to be something you really, really enjoy.

One Final Word

If you really, really, REALLY hate doing That Which Must Be Done and you absolutely can’t bring yourself to do it but it would adversely affect your life if it doesn’t get done, see if you can recruit a family member or friend to do it for you. And, yes, your reward will go to them, but at least the job will get done.

Sanity restored.

OBH over and out!

Sep 222014

It seems there’s a new scandal about some sweet young thing’ with leaked nude photos just about every day. While I’m sure it’s disturbing to these (usually) young women as their property has been stolen, let me give you a few pointers here.

People Want To See Your Hot Ass

If you’re famous, have a nice ass and decide to have it photographed, those photos are going to command a high price in cyberspace. Guard them well. Go sending them around willy-nilly and guess what? Somebody’s gonna snag ‘em and make a nice, tidy profit. Talk about ridin’ your ass!

If you’re proud of your body. . . I mean, hey, you set up the nude photo shoot, right?. . . then you’re going to get lots of attention and good publicity from this breach of private etiquette.

The Casting Couch Must Be Alive And Well

And I guess the big point is. . . why do you need nude photos of yourself? Is the casting couch still alive to that degree in today’s Hollywood that a beautiful woman has to show it all to get a part? Today’s clothing is pretty skimpy. Not enough dimples showing in that see-through outfit that’s already cut up to Kansas?

Grandma’s Gonna Blush?

To be perfectly honest, a lot of younger women ARE proud of their bods. Nothing wrong with that! If you’re willing to bare it all for a photographer, why do you care if someone else sees the pics? Afraid of them getting back to your parents or grandparents?  Your old teachers? Your pastor? Once they’re snapped, m’dear, it’s already too late to worry about that.

Yes, There Is A Moral Here

The moral of this story is plain, old-fashioned horse sense. If you want the contours of your T&A to stay secret, then don’t bare them for a photographer or anyone else as a commercial enterprise.

If you’d like your body parts to circle the globe, then leak ‘em and claim they’ve been stolen. Get the vapors as you wail, “I have leaked nude photos!” It’s great publicity and you can then flaunt those boob and butt shots with style!

Sadly, though, you can’t have it both ways.

But what do I know? I’m just Old Busted Hotness.


Apr 092013

Ladder of successLast week I wrote a post called “Ladder Up.” I use Facebook ladders to build one of my business pages. I gave a basic explanation of what and how.  Since that time, though, I’ve seen a lot of disgruntled folks on ladders and I think it comes down to two things: (1) Not using ladders properly and (2) Having unreal expectations about what you’re going to achieve with a promotional ladder. This may get a little long, but Old Busted Hotness is going to try to clear things up a bit. I am a supreme technoidjit, so if I can learn to use these things, you can, too. 😉

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